if i lose my job i also lose a home... my best friend i think i have lost... my mother i cannot stand but she would let me back in the house anyways... i cannot work at some company like blockbuster again, or anything with customer service (i might kill them or myself)... i have to force myself to eat... i dont enjoy television or movies... things that i love to do i m now indifferent... i try really hard not to cut myself... i just want to sleep... and i have no reason to get up...